If Your Keg Only Has One Spiggot

then Seriatim's not coming to your party! Welcome to the OctopusTap. Despite its octogonal title, it has a mere four delicious beer delivery devices, and advertises itself as "Great for parties, caterers, rental programs, weddings."

Also, great for getting oh-too-sober law students to attend your party, turning it into a cacophony of bullshit. Hmm...