In a 2003 patent case, Microsoft filed some documents online four minutes and twenty seven seconds late, in addition to submitting supporting affidavits seventy-two minutes late. The other side (Hyperphrase) moved to dismiss for tardiness. Crocker said 'yabba dabba do motherfuckers!':
Wounded though this court may be by Microsoft's four minute and twenty-seven second dereliction of duty, it will transcend the affront and forgive the tardiness. Indeed, to demonstrate the even-handedness of its magnanimity, the court will allow Hyperphrase on some future occasion in this case to e-file a motion four minutes and thirty seconds late, with supporting documents to follow up to seventy-two minutes later. Having spent more than that amount of time on Hyperphrase's motion, it is now time to move on to the other Gordian problems confronting this court. Plaintiff's motion to strike is denied.
Crocker knows how to tell someone to eat shit, and big ol' JP appreciates that. There are a lot of lawyers who are full of shit out there. Unlike ubiquitous Wisconsin legislative doofus Frank Lasee, the JP wants players, not haters.
When a UW-Madison professor was found to be escroquing money from the Feds by lying on a grant application, Crocker tossed him in the clink:
A federal judge took the unusual step of sentencing to three months in jail a professor of electrical engineering at the University of Wisconsin at Madison and fining him $10,000 for lying on a grant application he made to the National Science Foundation. In handing down that sentence, as reported by the Chronicle of Higher Education on Jan. 25, 1999, U.S. Magistrate Judge Stephen Crocker said, "Within the academic community, those who follow the rules must be assured they are not chumps, fools, or suckers."
You heard it here first: Stephen Crocker should be the next federal judge for the WDW.
1 comment:
JP - I loved your post. Well done. Please contact me at acevedo20058151@yahoo.com. I have some questions on the appointment process.
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